update

so its been awhile since i wrote anything. i guess i been busy with work, school, and such. well m relationship fell apart around the end of 2009 and ended on new years eve(what a way to end the year huh) and she says we're not broken up, we're "separated" but everyday i feel more and more that she moves away from me. and i cant fucking stand hearing about her ex. its like the world fucking revolves around him. she tells me that she loves me more than anyone else, but if she did then why is it that he is all i ever hear about. it would be nice to talk about me, or her(not involving him), or us. anything but this fucking asshole who alledgedly keeps hurting her. well if he keeps hurting you dont keep forgiving him. i've actually begun to hate the fact that i love her forreal . like i love her soooo much that i cant just walk away and i know i deserve better than this. i do. i dont deserve to be held to this. but then again maybe my life is meant to be filled with this pain and suffering........

i have to be honest on a few things. for like the whole entire past month my jealousy meter has been throough the fuckin roof cause like i worked long and hard for something i didnt get and then some other nigga comes in and a week later he gets it all. i had to work hard as fuck for u to tell me like 4 times that you lovedme reluctantly and a week after knowing this nigga you just willingly say these words. i can read. "this guy is amazing <3" is the reason i gave up. cause i was fucking tired of having to compete with other niggas. first was travis, i aint even know about him till he blew ur life by turning u away, then that nigga josh, it took him standing u up to get rid of him. after that i thought i was in the clear, finally i had you all to myself, but no. then this nigga cameron came in the picture and on the first day you know him, he's "amazing". in 4 months you never told me i was amazing. so that was it, i was done. i could not do it anymore. and u say the diff. between me and him is he trusts you and knows your comin home to him. well how am i supposed to feel secure when i'm constantly reminded that i'm not ur bf or when u tell me some other nigga has plans for yall and i ask "wut u gonna do?" you tell me "idk im gonna see wut happens" i look back on it and i dont wanna say it was a waste of my time but it really was. cause as hard as i worked for u, i never really had you, and if i did have you and the trust thing was a fuckin issue, then why not reassure me rather than say shit like " this is pointless" or "what r u gonna do about it" wtf is that forreal? its bullshit. and i cant hold any of this any longer. i gotta let it go. so here it is, i said it. u wanna discuss it , we can later

Call Me

Call me a sinner, call me a saint, tell me its over, I'll still love you the same, call me your favorite,call me the worst, tell me its over , I don't want you to hurt, its all that I can say, so I'll be on my way ♥

Momolu Vs Swaggerton

Mo~they say im kinda ugly, but mojo is so handsome...damn son, time to 'dunk' on your bitch, no AND 1...

Swaggerton~nigga just remember this is swaggertons world so any woman u grabbin on is swaggertons girl,and bitches may say that im too much,but swagger always pullin through when it be in da clutch, got my niggas in the ride they like pass the dutch doin doughnuts in the feild like what the fuck~S.B.K.


Mo~Do you remember who I am? Molow Da-Freakin Don...
Call me Mr. Ketchum, collecting hoes, no Pokemon
Hit it from the back, rip a bitch like a runway
And I also play NBA 2K5 on any givin Monday 
I be giving them girls 'facelifts', with no make up 
Superman a hoe, and dissappear when they wake up
Get so much bread that they calling me Yeast
Ben Wallace of the East, cept I still is the beast!!!


Swaggerton~this nigga talkin games,im speakin bout da money,oh yeah dats momolu but this is Swagerton honey. i got the game locked and niggas call me HHH im like tajiri throwin green shyt up in ya face,im all ova da place,can you smell it now?cause im the rock and i am layin da fuckin smackdown, yes i lay da smackdown, oh yeah i give da right hands and i am ownin shyt like my last name was mcmahon,but enough wit da wordplay,lets get back to da birdplay,cause i am so fly i understand wut da birds say



Mo~Molow Nicholas Cage
Packin a 12 gage
Killing all these niggas like it fuckin Streets of Rage
You may live in Swaggertown, but you breathing my mOzone
While Im fucking bitches with genetalia the size of a street cone...
I must be Naruto cause everybody other nigga is a shadow clone...
Unfortunately for them, No Brawl, they all just get pwned...
Not an Afro Samurai, more like a Ninja, Ninja
They trying so hard, while I'm just playing witcha...



Swaggerton~hey yo
2 words
swagger mode
imma spit
a swagger ode
i live off of
swagger road
and when i shit
its swagger load
my pet he hops
he's swagger toad
he kool
he eatin swagger flys
i live for all swagternity
cause my swagger
it never dies
2 words 
swagger truth
cause i cant tell 
a swagger lie
and all my niggas 
kool as shyt
my cliq known as
the swagger guys
i may be breathin mozone
but swagteria create da gas
so wen u get an idea
to go against swagger 
blow it out yo ass!!!!!


Mo~ Im about to achieve this Don Status
So Ima also throw a dagger
What you say? I can't hear you?
My swagger drowning out your swagger...
And flooding on your swagger road
Killing your silly swagger toad
But I don't think they're swagger flies
As they're more the result of your "swagger rhymes"
I gotta a dollar in my pants, or should I say ten dimes
Sit so hard that its getting in your eyes
Rap better than Gucci, getting more coochie
Dropping more lyricalness then the Japanese make sushi
Mr. Terrance Howard, all Hustle and Flow
I'm a fire test, your ladies stop, drop and roll...


Swaggerton~ ok,you came out here to play a gizzame
a lil rap contest,i put ya flow to shizzame
this right her,so hawt it out burns a flizzame
im all original i dont have to follow wizzayne
but i respect the niggas laid a patfh for me
cause witout em i couldnt be Swaggerton or KT
you see,the quality is greater than HD
and when Swagger tell bitches drop,they just get down to they knees
im ice cold,3000,just like in 4 brothers
in 5 minutes,i ate out all of my six lovers
they each had seven covers until 8 O'clock
the thickness was 9 times 10,thats my cock
i heard niggas tell me this the end,its no stop
cause plan to keep it going till i get wut i desire
im like the rain that just end parades and put out da fire
and my flow hit you so hard,had you spittin through da wire!!!

......

why is that i never seem to be mentioned in anything yet im so important? i must know

horny

maybe i should fuck you till the sun comes up
we'll do it real fast and slow
or we could fool around in thekitchen
i guess theres only one way to know

u always seem to keep me on point
i never seem to get any rest
or maybe u just wanna find out
wut its like to with the best

you always keep me real horny
no matter what time of day it is
u got me fiendin for the sex so bad
i know exactly what it is

ur horny

update

so ive been sick, flu, bummed out,missed out on the club 3 nights in a row now, been watching grey's anatomy from the very first episode non stop and i dont plan to stop this binge till i reach the season finale of season 4. it seems that things are just .....different. you ever had the feeling where everything was good one day and then different the next, well i have this feeling in me currently and it just seemed this way since last weekend and well it just seems as tho i have a greater outlook on things. i have questioned myself, asking myself what it is i am exaclty doing here, and the answer is i am currently doing nothing. i let my own setbacks set me back tho i hate to see others let themselves be held back by setbacks, im struggling to seperate myself from the image of my ex-bestfriend. very few things can cause such a struggle within me. i am seen as a heartless cold bastard who makes decisions based on what i can gain from the outcome, yet this is not who i want to be seen as. my dilema is finding my image,my self image,one that does not involve me being attatched to an asshole. and i know where the answer lies,but im afraid to turn to it. im afraid to look to God for help,afraid to ask for help frfom those he seemingly placed in my life to do just that,help me. why,i do not know,but i need to get over this fear before it has become too late......